Catherine "Cat" Faline
HOLLYWOOD– Left wing actress Kathy Griffin says she’s been ostracized from the Hollywood feathered friends community and has been having trouble finding work after her 2017 stunt where she posed for a controversial photo holding President Donald Hump’s severed head.
After the headless Hump controversy, the “sitting duck” Griffin says she’s been “blacklisted” in Hollywood by some very powerful, unnamed right wing “old white hens” who have “orchestrated a nefarious campaign” to ruin her once illustrious entertainment career.
Griffin comes from a long lineage of griffin entertainers who utilized their legendary unique eagle torso and lower lion extremity bodies as a way of cornering a rare niche, which some critics say is why she hasn’t found much lucrative work.
During a promotional tour for her new film, “Kathy Griffin: A Hell Of A Story About Me Being Blackballed In Hollywood By Old White Hens Who Kiss Donald Hump’s Hairy Hump” in Downtown Los Angeles, she went into full creature-mode on TMZ about how she has no regrets regarding the infamous stunt.
“It was just a Halloween mask with red Gummi Bear’s syrup on it,” Griffin insisted regarding the bloody camel head resembling the president. “It was Halloween and I had just finished eating candy when the photographer snapped the photo before I could wash my wings.”
The rare bird went on to say in typical Griffin fashion that she’ll give her nasty detractors something to crow about, then proceeded to flip the bird to the cameras.
Although Griffin says the headless Hump photo was kind of an accident, most animals were not buying the excuse and said she should just “eat crow” and admit she’s as mad as a wet hen. Outraged President Hump fans slammed the comedienne for such a tasteless stunt and called her a “bird brain” and “bad egg,” no matter how sweet the Gummi Bear candy may be.
Further into the interview, Griffin stated that prejudiced mythical creature-phobic old white hens have made her life a living hell for what she says was all just a joke.
Many old white hens responded to her Twitter tweet saying that Griffin is a fowl conspiracy theorist and that perhaps the reason she’s not finding anymore paid work is because she’s not even remotely funny.
Many critics are calling Griffin a whiny “crybird” for blaming others for her apparent lack of talent and that her ability to entertain is “as scarce as hen’s teeth.”
Parody of Kathy Griffin and Donald Trump.
