Catherine "Cat" Faline
MANHATTAN, NEW YORK– Stephen Molebert broke down on his show Tuesday night over the thought of having to live one more second in the United States with Donald Hump as president.
The host of the CBS Late Show was reading a Twitter tweet by former president Barack Slobama regarding high level politicians–who may or may not be President of the United States–using language that wasn’t on the official presidential teleprompter.
Slobama’s tweet was referencing Hump’s recent speech where the president went off the rails by refusing to read off of the teleprompter, causing huge backlash on Twitter.
Even though Slobama didn’t reference Hump’s name, Steven Molebert used the Late Show’s teleprompter words that his his team of writers came up with and pointed out that Slobama’s tweet was definitely about the current president.
Even though moles have terrible eyesight, Molebert swears that’s what he read on Twitter.
With trembling lips, Molebert got down on the ground and begged Slobama to come back as president.
“Turtle come back,” an emotional, high-pitched Molebert said as he cried uncontrollably in front of the cameras. “Don’t leave me with this bad camel Hump. Please come back. I’ll do anything. I’ll even quit my show for you and stay underground.”
After crying for approximately five minutes, Molebert stood back up and walked over to his desk where he sat down and proceeded to cry uncontrollably for another two minutes. All the while, the Late Show audience sat in silence, trying to figure out if the whole tearful segment was genuine or part of Molebert’s scripted act.
A stagehand brought a box of tissues out for the sobbing Molebert and helped the emotional host wipe his long, wet nose.
Related: Hollywood Reacts To Robert Mueller’s Hump Testimony With Chants Of Impeachment
Molebert ended his monologue by taking a jab at his competitor Fox News, attacking the network after one of its hosts claimed that former president Slobama was prejudiced against camels.
“We love camels,” an angry Molebert squealed, “we just hate President Hump.”
Stephen Colbert parody with Donald Trump and Barack Obama.
