{"id":2080,"date":"2019-04-02T18:50:19","date_gmt":"2019-04-02T23:50:19","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/squirrellips.com\/?p=2080"},"modified":"2019-12-31T23:41:28","modified_gmt":"2020-01-01T04:41:28","slug":"finally-elon-muskrat-builds-a-massive-bridge-to-mars","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/squirrellips.com\/index.php\/2019\/04\/02\/finally-elon-muskrat-builds-a-massive-bridge-to-mars\/","title":{"rendered":"Finally! Elon Muskrat Builds A Massive Bridge To Mars"},"content":{"rendered":"

LOS ANGELES, CALIFORNIA– Billionaire Elon Muskrat has finally accomplished the unthinkable by building a bridge that starts on earth and extends 33.9 million miles into space<\/a>, ending on the planet Mars.<\/p>\n

Muskrat is calling this bridge the ‘bridge over troubled wavelength’ and says that it has been constructed so that even a little old grandma can drive her car over it on her way to the red planet.<\/p>\n

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See also: <\/strong><\/span>Bamboo Origin’s New Cub Spacecraft Launches NASA Experiments<\/strong><\/a><\/em><\/p>\n

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The bridge is built out of a crystalline element called Bilitrium, which is a very powerful source of energy. Muskrat’s SpacedEx was able to combine the element with a newly discovered alloy, which gave them the material needed to construct the bridge.<\/p>\n

Many animals assumed that the entrepreneur was going to go with his original idea of building a massive rocket that launched into space the same way a plane takes off and lands.<\/p>\n

In other words, why would anyone want to take the time to drive that far when they could just hop into a rocket and be there in a fraction of the time.<\/p>\n

\"Parody
Elon Muskrat boasts that this bridge to Mars will be the greatest creation in history.<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

In truly Muskratian fashion, he took to Twitter to silence all the naysayers who seem to have forgotten how fun the old days were when you’d get into a car with the family and drive somewhere on vacation.<\/p>\n

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Related:<\/span> Bamboo Origin’s New Cub Spacecraft Launches NASA Experiments<\/a><\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n

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“Why just hop into a rocket and be there in two hours?” Muskrat tweeted. “Just think how much more fun it’ll be to drive in your car with the family for 228 years until you finally reach Mars.”<\/p>\n

Elon Musk Space X parody.<\/span><\/em><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

LOS ANGELES, CALIFORNIA– Billionaire Elon Muskrat has finally accomplished the unthinkable by building a bridge that starts on earth and<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":8,"featured_media":2082,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"colormag_page_layout":"default_layout","footnotes":""},"categories":[30],"tags":[216,218,217,171,61],"adace-sponsor":[],"class_list":["post-2080","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-news","tag-elon-musk","tag-mars","tag-muskrat","tag-space","tag-twitter"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/squirrellips.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2080","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/squirrellips.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/squirrellips.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/squirrellips.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/8"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/squirrellips.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=2080"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/squirrellips.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2080\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/squirrellips.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/2082"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/squirrellips.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=2080"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/squirrellips.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=2080"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/squirrellips.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=2080"},{"taxonomy":"adace-sponsor","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/squirrellips.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/adace-sponsor?post=2080"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}